Basically, you're brave, daring, chivalrous, and pretty much.. an all around good person. Of course, some see you as a goodie-two-shoes. But hey, it's true! You're really good at winning, and normally always come out as the hero. Everybody likes you.. except, maybe, the Slytherins. You're too perfect. No, really.. You're too perfect. It's annoying to watch you win, repeatedly. Oh well. Be proud anyway.
from Laurie
Sir Brian made this comment,
Heh heh... does this mean i'm not supposed to like you? check out my Info page on LJ ;-)
Didn't you think that was cool?! I've only read one of the books though. As soon as I finish the Vonnegut and Kerouac I'm reading, I think I'll read another.
The Great Race, http://www.greatrace.com has begun. My friend Laura is doing her third race!!! This year she is doing support, previously she has raced as a navigator and also done support for the same team.
I am going to meet her on route next week!!!! I am so excited!
Anyone on the route, please stop by and say hi! Go see all the cool cars and great racers.
her team's site is: http://www.landroverparts.us a daily update link can be found there
the schedule can be found here: http://www.landroverparts.us/greatraceSchedule.html
Her team's car is #45, the only Landrover on the race
I went off to Office Depot questing for some transfer paper I heard was on clearance, it may have been earlier but it was all gone when I got there. What was there was a Motorola Bluetooth Portable Wireless Speaker for $30 which seemed reasonable so I got it!
I charged it up and tried it out, it sounds better than my phone's speaker phone and has a volume control and voice dial. Unfortunately, everyone I have on voice dial is asleep except one lucky person who is at a concert, so I called and heard a Pink Floyd song, and it sound fairly good.
It came with a neat little carry case to attach to the visor of your car. 3 hrs talk time, 100 hrs standby. Not bad.
Laurie made this comment, I was there. I was there!!! I was wondering why he just kept holding the phone and not saying anything. That's so funny! The festival was great. I'm sure Wang Chi will post reviews tomorrow. I hope he let you hear more than one song!
Why is my tongue blue? Well the day started out strange, strange emails, not pretty storywriting, an assortment of offline ims I wasn't expecting. I went to work, it was dead, worked on sales tax and a red and black bra during my breaks. I don't normal wear black but it is the only color of powernet I have that seems to go with the red I wanted so once I decided on that, I thought might as well accent it with black picot edge elastic. After I closed the store, I worked on it for another hour or so, got everything done but the back clasp and the straps done. Don't know if it will fit but hey it looks interesting. Maybe I can be like those people who fill their library full of never read leather bound books, except I can fill my lingerie drawer with funky lingerie...
Anyway (or anyways-for Laurie) back to the blue tongue, so I decide to stop on the bra, I am kind of sick and getting rather feverish, so I decide to find myself a place to swim as it was about 85 out. I kind of remember that there are two lakes north of the store with beaches, though one is closed. I look at a map, yes that does occasionally happen! I only have a state map, but it does show the general vicinity of two lakes beginning with the letter J, Johanna and Josephine, so I decide they might be ideal places to swim. The fact that I do not have a swimsuit with me I decide is immaterial, ones doesn't need a swimsuit to swim. I am wearing a long sleeve shirt and light loose trousers that are tight at the ankles, and my current hat of favor, no problem I have swum in worse or less or something. I have even swum in this particular hat.
So I drive north until I find Lake Johanna, the one that is closed. There is a sign clearing saying closed and part of the road is blocked off, the rest of the road is full of parked cars, including a couple police cars. The park is full of people, having picnics and bar-b-ques. So I join the illegal parkers and head down to the beach, take my sandals off and start into the water, at which point a very nice policeman tells me I can't swim because the park is supposed to be closed. A few people come over to listen to him explain that the park really is closed despite the number of people in it, he points out that they all know this too because none of them is the water! I concede it his point and am starting to leave when the listening people invite me to their bar-b-que, since I can't swim ;-)
Now my blue tongue and I are dancing along with a Bollywood music video on PBS, great fun, a mixture of dance styles!!!
I wrote this a while ago and meant to post it, can't remember why my tongue was blue now :(
I just watched the movie, Baran (Rain). A surprisingly interesting Iranian film about love and change. Most of it is set in a dipladated construction site where it seems none of the workers ever get paid, but food and tea is provided. Not your standard love story at all. It has a nice water theme as well.
Saw "the Seagull's Laughter" the other night, it was fun. A dark Icelandic comedy of sorts, the main characters are all women so by some guy's definition it is a chick flick. However, this is not a tear jerker but an empowering film where "women are asserting their independence and men are keeling over." It not rated in Icelandic with English subtitles. I recommend it. The portrayal of life in a remote Icelandic village in the 50's is also interesting.
I was in Iceland once, not in the fifties though, but loved it with all my heart. Hey, and if you thought Chicago was windy, go to Iceland, and think again!!!
Just finished watching a the movie "The Young Visitors or Mr. Salteena's plan" a somewhat surreal movie based on a story written by a 9 yrs old girl in 1890 in 12 days. It is almost satire about love, relationships, materialism, strange insight for a young girl to write. When I switched the dvd off and back to TV on PBS there appeared to be the former Cat Stevens singing Sad Lisa, a song I can easily relate to having been on both sides of it:
"She hangs her head and cries in my shirt She must be hurt very badly Tell me what's making you sadly Open your door, don't hide in the dark You're lost in the dark, you can trust me 'Cause you know that's how it must be
Lisa, Lisa Sad Lisa, Lisa
Her eyes like windows tricklin' rain Upon her pain getting deeper Tho' my love wants to relieve her She walks alone from wall to wall Tho' I know she likes to be near me
Lisa, Lisa Sad Lisa, Lisa
She sits in a corner by the door There must be more I can tell her If she really wants me to help her I'll do what I can to show her the way And maybe someday I will free her Tho' I know no one can see her" Sad Lisa-Cat Stevens
I think of a lost friend, who helped take me from the darkness, regain my silliness, optimism, dreams, just be me again. I could just be me, that was enough, whatever me was from moment to moment, I was so comfortable in that space we shared, I could go out and take on the world again. I could bring new people, relationships into my life, be support of my gf who is dying, be creative, deal with fire inspectors, put the past behind me and once again believe that life would get better somehow, and it did.
Then when darkness began to overtake him I did everything I could, it seemed to both of us that I was helping but somehow he got lost. I know I am part of the darkness, as well as the light, nothing I can do but wait hope and try to be the person he helped me find again.
When he left the last time in July, he said he would be back and I said I would be here. He said don't you dare waste away, just continue to be you, knowing you are you is good enough for me. Sometimes, in the stress and worry of the lingering uncertainty, I get upset, hurt and angry. I forget who he is, who I am, how we are linked, kindred spirits, that none of this is intentional, that we are lucky.
I try to keep going forward, to have faith, to not think of the lost of time. Sometimes it is so frustrating, I want to tell him so much: I got a new car, I am traveling, making swishy skirts, designing pants with strange pockets, seeing old friends, haven't broken or ripped anything all year! Anna moved back to England. I have been only in the er once this year! I am getting to know someone I really like, am considering more conventional relationships, saw Al perform, heard (and talked with) Richard Thompson.
There are also the things that are the same- its mid June and the garden is not fully planted, I still didn't finish the curtains, I have the same job (for now...), and he is still my rock, wherever he is, however lost and wobbly he may be. I know he would be here if he could. I will try to remember that.
Dorothy made: this comment,
So sad....reminds me of a female version of "Sundown, Yellow Moon...."
I thought I left a comment yesterday but it isn't here. I must be skipping a step. I think I said I hope everything comes out okay and I hope you're okay. If that isn't what I said, it's what I'm feeling for you today. I hope you're okay.
Dorothy-"Sundown, Yellow Moon...." ??? I had to look that up. Well umm, we never had a falling out, and we had no idea it would be so long, I guess its more like "Fire and Rain" if you know the story behind it, but hopefully this one will end better.
Laurie-Thank you, I hope everything comes out okay too, and SOON!!!! I am mainly okay, 5 out of 7 nights okay this week ;-) You had asked about July...
This morning it smelled like a candles being extinguished in my kitchen while I was unloading the dishwasher. I checked all the kitchen appliances and unplugged a few for good measure. Then I was writing the previous blog entry while being immed like mad by dbird who just got home from college for the summer and has a bit too much time on his hands ;-) anyway, I then smell something burning like wood embers. I open a window, no smoke, check the apartment hallway, nothing. Then one of the light bulbs by my computer starts flickering, its a compact fluorescent, so I shut off the lamp, lift up the shade and its burning!!!!!
Never seen that before, and I wonder if it was because I was reading Laurie's post about being a "funny shit magnet"
Laurie made this comment, Girl! Thank God you were home!! I have two of those torchiere lamps in my living room and I read somewhere that they tend to catch fire. (Hey, they were cheap.) So, I never leave them on when I leave the house.
Thursday, June 9, 2005
A friend basically asked me this tonight. All I could say is that with this particular man treats everyone he loves badly, just look at how he treats his own child. He feels because he is in an intimate relationship with her, he need not be be courteous, kind or even polite anymore. He balances kindness with abuse, intimacy with rejection, and he has done this almost since the beginning of their relationship. She seems to believes that if he really loved her, he would magically become a different person, like a fairy tale of some sort, that love is a magic pill.
For several years I have watched, listened and comforted her as their relationship goes through the same cycles over and over again. There are things she can do to change the patterns, which she does occasionally, but she can't be consistent, it is as if she does not value herself enough to hold him accountable. In many ways she rewards his bad behavior by giving him her complete attention whenever he does something. So many times when she thinks this guy is leaving her, she calls upset that her world is ending. He'll never leave her for real, why should he? She always goes back to him, and he gets what he wants. It has been very depressing and upsetting to watch.
UPDATE-11-07-She finally broke free of him, YEAH!!!
This was passed to my by my newest blogging friend, Laurie ...
* Three screen names that you have had: Carpe Cavy, Lily, Astarte * Three things you like about yourself: my inability to get bored, I don't give up, I am a fighting survivor * Three things you don't like about yourself: I get so distracted, some commitment problems, can't handle suspense * Three parts of your heritage: Anabaptists, Yiddish, DAR ;-) * Three things that scare you: people disappearing, drunk drivers, being trapped * Three of your everyday essentials: comfortable place to sleep, clean warm water, decent food * Three things you are wearing right now: swishy skirt, sandals, watch * Three of your favorite songs: Songs out of clay, awake, awake, sexual healing * Three new things you want to try in the next twelve months: a certain Baron ;-), coaching classes, monogamy * Three things I want in a relationship: laughter, love, passion * Two truths and a lie: I could sell you your grandmother if I wished, I can't sleep if I am upset, I wear makeup daily * Three things you can't do without: my family, my friends, my mac * Three places you want to go on vacation: Lhasa, Kathmandu, New Zealand * Three things you just can't do: ice skate, like the taste of alcohol, be a serial monogamous * Three kids' names: Maya, Alexander, Evgenia * Three things you want to do before you die: see all my friends, change the world, be at peace * Three Celeb crushes: Don't really have any, but ones I think might be fun-Teller, Pedro Almodóvar, Rufus Sewell. * Three people I nominate to complete this exercise: Wang Chi, Geoff Arnold, Pickle
Geoff made this comment, I think I already did a version of this - see http://www.geoffarnold.com/mt-archives/000546.html comment added :: {ts '2005-06-07 19:25:20'} GMT-06 :: http://geoffarnold.com
Laurie made this comment, Thanks for doing this. I hope you get to go to all of those fabulous places! comment added :: {ts '2005-06-09 16:53:50'} GMT-06
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